Today I got a text from Peter.
Pete: Kim wants to have a radio show with you.
Sara: OHMYGOSH did you tell her how I always tell you how great I think I would be on the radio?!
Pete: Yes. I did. Text her.
Sara: What am I supposed to say?
Pete: Let’s do a radio show.
Sara: Just making sure, but this is all hypothetical, right?
Pete: No clue. Kim is unemployed currently, so the world is her burrito.
NOTE: Kim is taking a leave of absence from her job because she’s been a LITTLE busy with this.
Every morning on my way to work, I flip between radio stations trying to find a morning show that doesn’t annoy the living daylights out of me. There are too many commercials, and in between the commercials I’ve found that the people talking are talking about the STUPIDEST things (What kind of food do YOU like pickled? … Oh, the Packers won the Superbowl? Back in FEBRUARY? I had NO idea!! … There’s MORE Charlie Sheen drama?!?!)
Whenever I have a REALLY dreadful morning show experience, I proceed to tell Peter that I think I would be a great morning host. I could talk to people on the phone, play songs that I like, and talk about whatever I wanted! Helloooooo best idea everrrrrrrr. Peter always responds, “I think that it’s a little bit more work than that…” Who cares?! Seriously, give me the mic.
I’ve even been ON the radio before! A few years ago, I did a commercial promoting the Walworth County Fair “Got Milk?” booth. I LOVED recording it. The only problem was that I hate the sound of my voice (doesn’t everybody?), so whenever I heard it play on the radio, I would groan and switch the station. Or sit and listen to it in disgust. “Do I REALLY sound like that? How do you STAND listening to that VOICE?!”
Speaking of hating the sound of my voice, when I first started my job, I had to record my voicemail message. I wrote out what I was going to say and made Donald leave his cubicle for a little bit so that I could record unheard. What made it WORSE is that I had to record the same message twice – once in English pause once in Spanish. You thought you hated the sound of YOUR voice? Record yourself speaking another language that you think you’re semi-decent at. Warning: Your confidence in said second language will go crashing down to sub-zero levels.
I DO get nervous around microphones though… For about 5 seconds, and then I embrace the shit out of that sucker. Except once…
As a gift a few years back, one of his children bought Peter’s grandpa a voice recorder. The idea was that he use it to record himself telling stories/the family history/etc. Instead, he uses it to record events (holidays, birthday parties, little get-togethers, etc.).
Last month, Peter and I were home for a weekend to see our families, celebrate birthdays, and find out Jenna and Mark are having a baby (OHMYGOD I KNOWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! Due September 20). For his grandma’s birthday, we made it to the little get-together at the grandparents’ house for cake and ice cream.
Scene: Group of people standing in the living room talking. Enter Grandpa R. Standing with this arms crossed.
Grandpa R: So, here we are at Grandma’s birthday. Standing in the living room talking we have so and so, so and so, so and so, Sara, who is Peter’s girlfriend, so and so (etc.). Who wants to guess how old Grandma is?!
Random numbers thrown out. Laughter. Grandpa R. begins asking questions to everyone in the circle. Cue Sara.
Grandpa R: Sara is dating Peter. How old are you Sara?
Sara: 23? (because obviously I don’t know…)
Grandpa R: Sara, now, tell me what you’re doing. You just moved to Green Bay?
Sara: What’s that in your hand? Are you RECORDING this?
Grandpa R: Oh, don’t you worry about that. Now what is your job?
Sara: Are you going to play this back? I hate the sound of my voice.
Grandpa R: No, no, it’s fine! Just ignore it.
Sara: I can’t ignore it.
Scene fade out.
I asked Peter’s cousin Hillary to tell me what exactly was going on with the voice recorder. She told me.
Sara: OHMYGOD, is he going to play that BACK later?!? I’m SO embarrassed!!
Hillary: No, he won’t play it now. He likes to listen to it later though, and then he smiles and laughs at all the good times he’s had.
Sara: That tape needs to be destroyed.
For the record, I love Peter’s grandpa. Seriously. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t want to just grab the recorder from his hand and talk right into it. I do MUCH better with the microphone in my hand.
Can’t wait to have THAT one played back in 20 years…