Well. THAT wasn’t the reaction I was expecting.
FLASHBACK: Dinner on Tuesday night.
CHARACTERS: Sara (obviously) and Skywalker
SCENE: Sitting at the dinner table in Sara’s apartment. It’s leftover night. A plethora of choices including: tuna macaroni, spaghetti, steamed vegetables, and hot dogs.
Ok, so this conversation is how I remember it. Ask SKYWALKER if you want HIS side of the story. HOWEVER. My re-enactment is very, VERY close to what actually happened. I KNOW it.
*Earlier in the day, Sara emailed Skywalker that she was excited for him to read her blog post because she wrote about him. Then she emailed him again and said that she didn’t write anything mean. What Sara was REALLY excited about was the ALIAS that she had chosen for her boyfriend. YAY surprises!!
Sara: So. Did you read the blog?
Skywalker: You named me SKYWALKER?!?
Sara: DON’T YOU LOVE IT?!?!
Sara: What? Are you kidding?
Skywalker: I don’t know why you don’t just use my real name – everyone knows who I am.
Sara: I’m respecting your privacy!!! I thought it was CLEVER.
Skywalker: But SKYWALKER? EVERYONE KNOWS IT’S ME!
Sara: … Well at least I didn’t name you Chewbacca. I really WAS going to do that you know. I put a lot of thought into this! You like Star Wars! It’s like calling you a Superhero! Look at me! I’m DATING a SUPERHERO!!!!!!!!
Skywalker: Just call me by my real name.
Sara: I like Skywalker.
Peter: You’re mocking me.
Sara: I REALLY thought you would like it! I THOUGHT I WAS BEING CLEVER! I was GOING to call you CHEWBACCA.
Skywalker: Sar. People aren’t going to take me seriously. People that read your blog are going to come up to me and say, “Oh hey SKYWALKER, what do YOU do? Fight JEDIS?!?!”
Sara: Really? NO ONE TAKES ME SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!
Skywalker: Just… Call me by my real name.
Sara: Fine. I’ll CHANGE it.
… Moments of silence …
Sara: You know, everyone DOES know who are are. I mean, gosh, I put a picture of you on there.
Skywalker: I know.
Sara: Huh. I didn’t even THINK of that.
Skywalker: … I know…
Sara: Ok. So, hypothetically speaking, what WOULD you be called if you could be called something? I mean, I WISH I could re-name myself. But I just can’t. My real name is in the TITLE.
Skywalker: I’m not doing this with you.
… Moments of Silence …
Sara: OH. SO. The Fincutters emailed me about dinner. What’s the plan?
Skywalker: Well we can go to the place inside Lambeau or more of a Supper Club.
Sara: What’s a Supper Club?
Skywalker: You don’t know what that is?
Sara: I know what the Breakfast Club is.
Skywalker: Are you kidding me? Duck Inn? Crandall’s?
Skywalker: How have you gone your whole life not knowing what a Supper Club is? Where’s my phone, I need to text your mom.
*As Skywalker is texing my mom, I text her too. “Skywalker is being mean to me.”*
Sara: She didn’t text ME back… What are you saying to her?! What’s so FUNNY???? Why is she texting YOU and not ME?! I’M HER DAUGHTER.
Skywalker: Well, I said, “I just spent the last 10 minutes trying to explain to Sara what a Supper Club is.” and she said “Welcome to my life.”
^ding a ling^
Sara: Tay just texted me. “What’s a Supper Club?”
Skywalker: Give me your phone.
Sara: What are you saying?
Skywalker: “You’re dumb too.”
**Scene fades out**
So, folks, now I shall reveal to you the man that you have known as Skywalker for all of three days. Gone shall be his privacy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NAME: PETER W. ROMENESKO
OCCUPATION: MARKETING COORDINATOR
SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER: Just kidding, Pete.